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Friday, July 9, 2021

“When Thieves Give You Lemons” • by Duke Kimball


“Ale?”

“No.” Glog the Conqueror spat on the floor. Nobody in the bustling tavern seemed to mind. “Talk.”

Flindel the Rat bared yellow teeth, producing the talisman from a billowing sleeve. A small, golden sphere he set on his plate. “Belonged to Morfan the wizard.”

“Power?”

“Invisibility.”

A hand tapped Glog’s shoulder. “It’s good ale.”

“No.” He glowered at Flindel. “How much?”

“Weight in gold.” He eyed the big man greedily. “Yours.”

“The best ale—”

Both men turned. “NO!” they shouted at the sniveling barkeep, returning to negotiations. Over… a lemon.

“I’m pretty sure,” Flindel seethed, “he wasn’t our waiter.”

Glog, axe already drawn, began the chase.

¤     ¤     ¤

 


Duke Kimball is a literary boat captain who doesn’t currently own a boat. His work has appeared in places like Mysterion, Star*Line, and Strange Horizons. He lives in Lansing, Michigan, with his wife Michelle and a dog named after a cheese factory.

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And now, a few words from the publisher…

Bruce Bethke here. This week The Pete Wood Challenge is bringing you seven new flash fiction stories, all of which key off some slight variation on the phrase, “I’m pretty sure he wasn’t our waiter.” In an ideal world we’d like to see you express your appreciation for these stories by taking a closer look at our other magazines, chapbooks, and original novels, probably starting with STUPEFYING STORIES MAGAZINE

But if you already have all the books, ebooks, and audio books you could ever possibly use, then I’m going to switch to my old public radio on-air voice and tell you that STUPEFYING STORIES and Rampant Loon Media are supported by the generosity of readers and listeners like you. If you appreciate the kind of programming we’re bringing you, please show it by clicking this link or the button below to make a donation today. All major credit cards are accepted, and all donations go directly towards paying the authors and artists who create the content you’re enjoying on this site.


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